Preparing To Become a Parent

 In The Family, A Proclamation to the World it states, "The first commandment that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and wife. We declare that God's commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force." This statement gives power to the principle of parenthood. As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day saints, we are taught that families are central to the plan of salvation. So much of what is done in this live includes family. We had families before we came to the earth, we live in a family while here, and when we pass on we will be reunited with our families again. This knowledge places a large emphasis on why we should prepare to become a parent. In the book Successful Marriages and Families it states "The earth was designed to be a habitation for spirit children of our Heavenly Father as they come from the premortal existence" (Hawkins et al, 2012, p. 151). This is one of the reasons that the earth was created. It was made in such a way that we can have all of the necessary resources to rear a family. We were also given the example of our Savior to follow. As we study and work towards becoming more like him, our potential to be a good parent increases.

How can you prepare for parenthood? The scriptures teach us that we should rear our children in love and righteousness. A parents place is to love, guide, teach, and respect their child. Brigham Young said "Parents should never drive their children, but lead them along, giving them knowledge as their minds are prepared to receive it. Chastening may be necessary betimes, but parents should govern their children by faith rather than by the rod, leading them kindly by good example into all truth and holiness (Widsoe, 1978, p. 208). In order to promote optimal development in a child, there are a few specific things that a child needs according to Hawkins:

• Love, warmth, and support
• Clear and reasonable expectations for competent behavior
• Limits and boundaries with some room for negotiation and compromise
• Reasoning and developmentally appropriate consequences and punishments for breaching established limits
• Opportunities to perform competently and make choices
• Absences of coercive, hostile forms of discipline, such as harsh physical punishment, love withdrawal, shaming and inflicting guilt
• Models of appropriate behavior consistent with self-control, positive values, and positive attitudes (Hawkins et al, 2012, p. 105).

As we turn to the Family Proclamation for guidance and advice and live choose to live in harmony with the principles that it teaches, the chances of our children choosing to live a righteous life are high.